Just some thoughts that came to me after reading my wife's blog today.
Oh, how I have tried to encourage my wife Kerry in her writing only to meet with the resistance of something like, "I can't do that yet, we haven't covered it in the writing class I'm working on."
She is already a very good and very capable writer. I try to gently remind her that the class is to help her develop the tools needed for "successful" writing, not for just writing.
I pray for her to be able to just be free to sit down and begin to pour out the multitude of treasures hidden within her heart and mind and put aside all the other stuff, including self-critique, until after she is done getting the thoughts down. I know it will come. She is a creature of habit and it is difficult for her to break those habits.
And my contribution to the matter... far too often has just been expressed frustration with her because I am more of a "just do it" personality. I attack things get the bulk of the thing done and then go back. When that applies to writing I may edit 46 times after I've finished, but if I don't get the thought out and down, swoosh, out of the brain it goes and it just may never come back again. Really!
Anyway for those of you that read this, I invite you to pray with me for Kerry and her writing so that she can know she is successful, not because of accomplishments, but because God has said that she is more than able through Christ who strengthens her (and us).
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3 comments:
Thanks David. Love you!
it is very difficult when our personality is so opposite our spouse. my ex had the ability to have a full agenda at work - he could have back-to-back meetings all day, including breakfast, lunch and dinner meetings, all on different topics, fly out that night for a meetings/presentations the next day on yet different topics and be as calm as a cool breeze. the thought of that stressed me to no end. i like things done at the end of the day ... not carried over. i need some mental time between things. he processes information as he receives it. i process information by putting it in a holding tank, mulling it over, then dwelling on it, then mulling it over some more, and eventually i process it all. drove him NUTS!!! (still does!)
it took years, but i finally began to relax about how he did and did not do things.
Kerry has her own personality and strengths and way of processing information ... which is obviously very different from yours ... but not any less efficient for her or capable for her or effective for her.
yet, i appreciate, and understand, your desire for her to believe in herself the way you believe in her, too. what a gift you are to her! somewhere along the line i over-did that, or something negative, with my ex to the point where i could offer no encouragement or praise without him rolling his eyes and sarcastically spitting out, "i know what *you* think, ame." it was never enough for him to know what i thought.
i believe that's true, and i was even thinking about that earlier today. though we need the support of our spouse and family and friends, when the water boils and nothing's left in the stock pot, what we need to be able to hear is God saying, "I love you; I love you; I love you. I have gifted you and talented you and desire for you to do what I have already hard-wired you to do - for you to do that which brings you joy all along the journey. For when you use the gifts and talents I have given you with great joy, it brings ME great joy knowing how much you delight in the gifts I have bestowed upon you!"
Dear God, this is what I pray for Kerry - that she will hear Your voice ... directing her ... calling her ... gently caressing her and encouraging her. May she know that it is not only okay to love and enjoy that which You have gifted her and talented her with, but it is what You truly desire! You swell with joy when we delight in what You do for us and gift to us! May Kerry find that opening and loving and finding joy in these gifts and talents from You, every day, bring both You and her abundant delight and joy! Lord, enable David to let go of his anxieties over how and why Kerry accomplishes her goals and uses her talents and gifts ... fill him with a knowing that this is how You have hard-wired Kerry ... and that it is perfect for her ... and that it is not only okay, but it is great! Thank You for this marriage, this covenant ... a beautiful reflection of Your covenant with us, Your church. Strengthen and fortify their marriage in new and glorious and beautiful ways every day! I love You, God, Ame
Thanks Ame!
We both agree that you are a blessing.
In return may you be richly blessed by the merciful hand of our God.
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